I am SO over this week.
Between the cat and the bad (for now) news I got yesterday I'm ready for the week to be over.
Yesterday morning my OB's office called and said that she had a family emergency and would be out of the office until after my due date. I asked to switch to another doctor that a good friend recently delivered with, but, no, they have decided the best (maybe easiest for them?) course of action is to shuffle me around the office and just reschedule my appointments on the same day with whoever is on call. (Is it supposed to be whomever? I can never remember.) So, basically for the next six weeks of my care I'm going to see any and all docs in the office. I might get to see one twice IF I go past 39 weeks. I was pissed and sad and cried my freaking eyes out. Honestly, I hadn't been feeling all that great about my care with my OB for a lot of the pregnancy, but within the last few weeks we had a good long talk, she signed off on my birth plan, and I was feeling a lot better about things. She seemed like my old OB. When I had Beanie I described her to everyone as a lot like a midwife in the fact that she took her time, listened to my concerns and etc. This time, for many of the appointments, I felt assembly-line rushed through. It sucked. But, like I said, I was feeling a lot better about things recently.
Glenn just didn't understand what the big deal was. I told him I thought it was some sort of sign and he laughed and said, "you've never been superstitious," which, to his credit, is absolutely true. He said, "why don't we just get a doula or whatever?" I actually think he called them a ma-doula but whatever, I knew what he was talking about. Number one: we can't afford a doula. Number two: Finding a doula we clicked with who's available for an April (or perhaps late March) delivery is probably going to be hard right now. After we talked, I realized he didn't think it was a big deal because there is no guarantee our OB would actually deliver 2.0 anyways. Which, there isn't. Unless we delivered during office hours we would be with whoever was on call. But, that doesn't change that I have 5 more appointments with 4 different people. That is a huge deal to me. It feels so impersonal. Like I'm going to be "new" every time I go in to have an appointment. And they don't know me from Joe Blow. We had a good chat though and, after talking, he understood why it upset me so much. It's way more than just having someone else deliver 2.0.
We made the decision to call a midwife group that also delivers at the hospital. We are likely most comfortable delivering at the hospital so I feel like it's a good way to go. Or at least worth checking out. I've heard good things about them, but, who knows, they could be closet OB's. Lol. I've heard conflicting things. They actually have a couple spots left for April deliveries so I'm going in for a meet and greet this afternoon. I have my 34 week appointment on Friday afternoon (right before our appointment to surrender Sammycat to the Humane Society), so I figure I'll get a feel for how my current office is going to treat us OB-less preggos. We'll have to make our decision pretty quickly; the MW office said those couple spots could likely fill very quickly. I don't doubt it.
So, we'll see. Wish me luck. After crying most of yesterday about everything, I'm starting to feel like maybe this is just what I needed to push me to get better care for myself and 2.0. I definitely align myself moreso with a midwive's view of childbirth and maybe I'll meet with one of them and really click. I am a bit worried because I do think it's the same type of thing -- meet all the midwives and one of them will be the one to deliver. I worry that with only 6 weeks of pregnancy left that I won't have the opportunity to really know any of them, but I do know it'll probably be easier to have a MW on board with my birth plan than finding another OB who will be on board with it.
After much thought, I decided to call my mom and talk to her last night. See, she isn't always the listening type. More like talks your ear off about anything and everything. Like an hour conversation with her is pretty normal. To my surprise, she actually listened. And was somewhat understanding about the cat because they had to put their cat down last year. But, her comment about switching to a midwife? "Well, you'll still be at the hospital, right? You don't want to be giving birth in a swimming pool." Actually, no I don't. For one, I can't swim so it would scare the piss out of me. And, two, they're birthing pools not swimming pools for crying out loud. It's like a kiddie pool. Anyways, I told her the birth center was right across the street from the hospital but that I doubted we could get a spot there for an April birth (they only take 5 people a month). And, while Glenn is fully supportive of transferring to MW care I think it'd take a little more work to get him on board with a birth center birth. Anyhoo, I just thought her comment was a little funny. Funny in an uneducated dismissive sort of way. Not funny funny.
So, wish me luck!