Sometimes I just feel like I'm waiting. Waiting for something. Waiting for many things.
Sometimes I feel stuck. In limbo.
Sometimes I feel like I'm drowning. Or like a time bomb about to explode.
Sometimes I feel like I'm ninety, not thirty-one. I can barely walk. I'm in so much pain. My head is pounding. I feel like I'm going to vomit.
Sometimes I wonder if I'm a big fat failure at this parenting thing.
Sometimes I want to get out for some time to myself, but I just don't know where. I don't want to talk to anyone. Not even long enough to order a coffee.
Sometimes I look at my daughter, her hair glistening in the sun and smile wide across her face, and wonder how I got so lucky.
Sometimes I look down at my son as he smiles at me while he's nursing and know I wouldn't trade anything for being where I am.
Sometimes I look in to my husband's eyes and know that I couldn't have a better partner in all of this.
Fortunately the good sometimes are starting to outweigh the bad ones.