Sunday, August 29, 2010

To bottle or not to bottle.

I've been writing this post in my head for quite a bit, but there's nothing like an interesting dinner table conversation to really get a blog post rolling.

Bubby has never had a bottle. He probably never will.

I've thought about it. I have nothing against bottles. If you want to pump and give your kid expressed breastmilk, if you want to supplement with a bottle of formula, if you choose to formula feed or your life circumstances dictate that you formula feed I have nothing against that. It's your decision, not mine.

For me, bottles seem like a pain in the ass and a bunch of work. The first thought to cross my mind when I think of bottle-feeding Bubby is, Why????

My boobs work just fine.

So, last night we went out to Claim Jumpers with my dad, stepmom and sister. I was excited to see they had a gluten-free menu (although most of it contained dairy so I had to be extra vigilant). Somehow over the course of dinner the conversation turned to the fact that I still haven't gone shopping with the Nordstrom gift card Glenn gave me for my birthday. Or that I haven't used the gift certificates he gave me for a massage last Mother's Day. Like 2009.

Point taken. I'm really bad at taking time for myself. But, I'm working on it.

My sister is going on and on about how her birthday gift to me was going to be a fancy lunch out, just us girls. So, now we have to go get massages (Glenn got two gift certs so we could go together), go out to lunch and go on a shopping spree. An all day affair. And, she says, Bubby needs to be okay with having bottles for a day. To which I reply, "Do you even realize how much my boobs would hurt if I was gone all day long??!!?"

I'm sure my dad was really excited about all the boob talk over his chili dinner.

And my stepmom says to Glenn, "Can't she express?" I quickly replied that yes, we had a small freezer stash but I was not discussing this right now.

I really don't think my dad, stepmom or sister have any real idea of what we were talking about. My sister and I were both formula-fed so my dad has no experience with breastfeeding, my stepmom never nursed her children, my sister doesn't have kids. Of course I can pump if I wanted to. In the middle of a shopping spree? Not so much fun. *insert fun visual image here*

If Bubby needed to have a bottle then we would try it. But, I don't really see the need. He's almost six months old. His feedings are usually pretty spaced out, or at least spaced out enough that I can run out and enjoy a little time to myself if I wanted to. I don't have any desire to be gone all day long. The time that I am Bubby's sole source of nutrition is fleeting in the scheme of things; it doesn't bother me to be at his beck and call, so to speak. He needs me close by. That won't always be the case and, for now, I am enjoying it.

I'm getting better and taking time to myself, even if it's just a nice long shower without a toddler playing in the tub or a baby in the room with me. Maybe taking twenty minutes to read a book or check my email in peace. Real honest-to-goodness me time.

I was really feeling ganged up on last night. I mentioned that to Glenn on the way home. I thought he and my stepmom were also talking about it while I was conversing with my sister. I guess that wasn't the case. I don't really feel the need to explain myself to my extended family about how we do things because that's just how we do things. I don't expect them to always understand, but just to be respectful.

To bottle or not to bottle? When I was having a really rough time I was thinking it might not be such a bad idea. Now I'm feeling good about how things are going and I just don't see the need. And I definitely don't see the need to discuss it over dinner at Claim Jumpers.


  1. Amen sister! My family does the same thing. Just give him a bottle, it doesn't hurt and it will help you. Doesn't matter that it would be uncomfortable for me to be away from baby all day, and no it isn't a day to myself if I have to stop and pump. The funny thing is that my mom nursed all of us and we didn't take bottles, and they didn't have pumps.

  2. I feel the same way. She is now almost 18 mo and I hardly ever leave her. I went away one weekend and had to pump 4+ times a day to feel relief and she was 13 mo old. The time they need us is really so short in the scheme of things. She likes nursing so much I joke that she's taking me to college. I know it will be all over soon and the bonding is wonderful. It's your baby and your relationship, no need for suggestions.

  3. I think you took the right approach - to just say "we're not talking about it right now." Your body, your baby, your choice. I probably wouldn't do bottles if I didn't have to work, and I agree, they are a pain. As is pumping. Pumping during a shopping trip? so not a good time, or worth it in my opinion! And you're right, time goes so quickly, enjoy the bonding while you can!

  4. I completely agree! I hate that mind don't work right and I am forced to give the bottle with formula! When I was pregnant someone said to me (which I shall not name since this is an open forum, not that I think they would see it) "you will have to give him formula if you plan to work, you can't breastfeed him forever." And of course this REALLY annoyed me, more especially because of who said it. But now that I have to, it upsets me more, but I have to do what is best for him! If I didn't have to though, I wouldn't!

  5. I have the utmost respect for moms who work and pump. I loathe pumping! Pumping for your baby is like a full-time job in itself and then add working outside the home and taking care of all things at home? Super Mamas I tell you!

    But I hate when people say, "Oh you'll HAVE to use formula." Yes, you can if you want to, but you don't HAVE to. And to plant that doubt in your mind beforehand??!? Boo.

    Here's a good link from Kellymom on increasing low milk supply if interested:

    I, for one, like a big batch of oatmeal cookies when I'm starting to think my supply is dipping :)


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