Ah, the sun is out. Beanie is running around in the backyard. Bubby is snoozing and I'm taking the opportunity to drink a bit of coffee and have a bit of time to myself. Once there's a little more shade out, Bubby and I can go out back and enjoy the gorgeous weather too. Glenn said he wants to go do something fun after he gets off work, so we're trying to make plans for the afternoon.
I love today.
I had a glimpse of feeling guilty that Beanie is out in the back by herself, but I really need about two seconds of time to myself. And, I'm in the dining room with our huge windows cracked. I can feel the breeze and hear her playful laughter. Nothing brings a smile to my face more.
I've been having a rough time lately. I know some people have it much, much worse than we do, but it's been hard. I've been down. And anxious. Having bad dreams. Lonely. It's been hard. I'm trying to keep an eye on things because I do have a history of depression and anxiety. I want to make sure we notice the signs of post-partum depression should they be arising.
I miss my hubby. I appreciate that he's working so much so that I can stay at home. I feel bad he didn't get a day off in almost 3 1/2 weeks. It was hard on him. And me. And Beanie. I'm jealous that other families go out and do fun stuff on their weekends while we don't seem to have the time (or energy or motivation or whatever).
I've recently gotten more involved in my AP mom's group. It's really nice. Everyone is so welcoming and friendly and everything. I have a hard time forging good friendships anyways, so it's nice to fine a place I feel "at home." It helps to have a super outgoing three year-old who makes friends wherever she goes. I'm excited to meet more people in the group & make some long-lasting friendships.
Well, gotta run. Bubby is up. Beanie is singing, "It's a happy day...I feel okay..." (Thanks Caillou).
It's a good day and I'm quite thankful for that.