I know I have PhD in Parenting linked over in my sidebar, but I wanted to highlight the following post...
Grin and bear it? Parenting, happiness and the pressure cooker
There was talk recently in my mom's group of the New York Magazine (I originally typed New York Times and have been meaning to edit since I published -- eek! Mommy brain on the loose) article mentioned in the post, but I haven't actually read it. I did really enjoy this post though.
I'm definitely guilty of trying to do it all. Not stepping back when I need a break and taking it. It's hard with our current scheduling and all, but I know there are times when I could allow myself more of a break than I do. Even just with Glenn watching the kids. And, in our situation that's all I'm really talking about. Right now we're not comfortable leaving Bubby with anyone else. And we don't have a village, that's for sure. We have a little family around, but they are busy with their own families, work, etc etc. We're not really comfortable leaving the kids with anyone who isn't family...just don't really see a need for that right now. Maybe when they are both older?
I've been trying to be better about getting some "me time" in, as little as it may be. I don't mind being around Bubby all the time -- he's a little nursling still and he needs his mama 24/7. I loathe pumping. But, I have really been trying to be okay with Bubby being upset and Glenn helping. It sounds so silly, like why wouldn't I want his dad to help him calm down? But, fact of the matter is, Bubby calms down better/faster/whatever for me. So, when he's crying his pour little eyes out and upset I want to help calm him. But, it's okay for us to take turns. Glenn is a source of comfort for Bubby too, although at this stage comfort for Bubby mostly equals the boob. He likes lunges too (likes them a lot actually!), but Glenn doesn't do them so often with him. I often wonder why. Anyway, getting off topic here....
What I'm trying to say is we do all need a little break. Some time to refresh ourselves as individuals whether it be a long shower (by myself without also having to shower a toddler -- lol), a night out with friends, or just a little time alone in your room reading a book. Even just a few moments. I often feel guilty asking for these moments. I think it boils down to feeling so bad for Glenn always being tired and working so darn much. But, then I think about how much I am working even though it might not be outside of the home. I've learned to ask when I need a little time. We both are. I still feel like our "me time" isn't exactly balanced, but we're working on it.
Anyway, I'm really glad I read that post tonight. It was good for me. I even got to read it enjoying a little "me time" while Bubby sleeps on the bed next to me. I'm sure many mamas wouldn't qualify that as me time, but Glenn is laying down with Beanie while she falls asleep and Bubby is sacked out on the middle of our bed which means I get computer time and get to type two-handed. That's good me time in my book ;)
What do you think of the article? Are you guilty of trying to do it all? What do you do to recharge?